Julie Metz is a graphic designer, artist, and freelance writer whose essays have appeared in publications including Glamour and Hemispheres magazines, and the online story site mrbellersneighborhood.com. The recipient of a MacDowell Fellowship, she lives in Brooklyn, New York, with her daughter and partner.  Her memoir, Perfection, is now available in paperback. 

You write about grief and lies with raw honesty in your memoir, Perfection. Have you been struck by the honesty of someone else’s writing? Or other forms of media?

A few recent memoirs that have really stayed with me are Sarah Manguso’s The Two Kinds of Decay and Meghan O’Rourke’s The Long Goodbye. Like so many readers, I was blown away when I first read Mary Karr’s The Liar’s Club and Kathryn Harrison’s The Kiss. I don’t think I would have been able to write my book without these trailblazing women as guides. All these writers are poets and novelists and they bring an inspiring skill and sensibility to their non-fiction. In other media, the 2011 documentary film “Buck” offers an unvarnished view of one man’s journey to overcome his abusive childhood. The skillful editing allows the viewer to experience raw emotions without sentimentality.

You are a writer, a graphic designer, and an artist. Do you find that your visual work informs your writing (or the reverse, perhaps)?

The two paths in my creative life often overlap and feed each other in surprising ways. Whether it’s drawing, designing, or writing—it’s all about making choices to tell a story or create an emotional response for an audience. All the senses are so interconnected. Ideas come to me while taking a walk in my neighborhood, in a museum looking at art, or listening to music.

Were you surprised by any revelations that developed through the act of writing your book?

Every writing day was a surprise. What I couldn’t have imagined at the beginning was the process of self-discovery in writing about past experiences. As the story itself unfolded in unplanned ways, there were times when I felt like a detective uncovering the mystery of my marriage. And I think that when you open yourself to such experiences, whatever the art form, it draws people and insight to you…a surprising kind of research.

Was it easy to select a title?

That came easily. The title Perfection is related to a book my husband was writing at the time of his death—a food travelogue about Umami, the so-called fifth taste, sometimes translated from the Japanese as “the moment of perfection.” So my memoir was about trying to understand a man who kept searching for perfection and in the process was self-destructive.

Would you describe your writing space? 

I write at a small desk in our living room. During the day I am usually the only person in the room, so it feels spacious and airy. There is a small jungle of plants in the windows facing the street and I love looking at them when I am searching for a word. Sometimes my materials spread out and about. In my fantasy life, I’d have a large study with large tables and wall space to post lists and ideas and images that inspire me. But I wonder what would happen if this fantasy became reality. I might be too intimidated to write! So for now I am good with my small desk. I have surrounded myself with writing charms: a small figure of Ganesh (remover of obstacles!); colorful stones I have collected from places I love; an antique inkstand and lightbulb; inspiring photos, shells and pieces of coral, a paper origami cat my daughter made for me when she was young; inspiring books of the moment; The Elements of Style, notebooks in progress, a small sculpture given to me by a friend. It’s quite a clutter actually, but all these objects give me comfort.

Above my desk I have hung a landscape painting by artist Christie Sheele, an abstract landscape with electric poles. It’s like a window I can look through when I need a breath of air.

Photos courtesy of Julie Metz

You’ve said that your most challenging job is being a mother (as the mother of a one-year-old girl, I’d have to agree with you!). What is your favorite book that you’ve shared with your daughter?

I struggle to name a single favorite. We loved picture books like Where the Wild Things Are and Lilly’s Purple Plastic Purse when she was little. We read all the Little Bear series, everything by Rosemary Wells, fairy tales of every sort, especially collections illustrated by the amazing Jane Ray. I loved reading her Alice in Wonderland. One of my personal favorites is a book I loved as a child, Jean Stafford’s Elephi, The Cat with the High IQ—an “only in New York story” published in the 1960s—still a great read! I read her the first of A Series of Unfortunate Events (after that she read the rest of the series on her own) as well as the first Harry Potter, before we moved on to the amazing Jim Dale audio series, excellent for long car trips. She always wanted me to read to her “with voices,” so I had to really think about portraying characters without any experience as an actor. The effort of those many evenings together has been a big help to me as an author. When I plan public readings, I still think about reading aloud in a way that would satisfy a discriminating five year-old. These days I am trying to get my now 15-year old daughter enthused about Jane Austen. You can never be lonely with one of her novels.

What are you working on now?

I can’t say too much about it now…but it is a memoir about my family history.

Lisa See is the New York Times bestselling author of Snow Flower and the Secret Fan, Peony in Love, and Shanghai Girls. Her latest novel, Dreams of Joy, is now available in paperback.

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Would you name three things that inspire you to write?

The desire to find out more about something that intrigues me, the desire to delve deeply into a single emotion (like love), and the desire to stay happy and busy.

What is one essential element of your writing process?

A thousand words a days, no matter what.

Of all the places that you’ve visited, which one stands out most in your mind?

Cambodia.

Would you describe your work space? 

I work in a very bright and airy room that overlooks our garden. However, I have bamboo blinds covering the window right where I work and my desk faces the wall so I won’t get distracted.  On my desk, I have Chinese wind-up toys, things my children made for me in elementary school (including a lamp with a shade made entirely of buttons – a second grade project), and all the notebooks I’ve used to take notes for each of my books.

What book have you reread most?

The Jungle Book, Volume II

Of all your work, is there a character you feel closest to?

Yes!  There’s a character that has appeared in all my books. In Dreams of Joy, she was Madame Hu; in Shanghai Girls, she was Pearl’s mother-in-law; in Peony in Love, she was the grandmother; in Snow Flower and the Secret Fan, she was the matchmaker; in my three mysteries, she was the Neighborhood Committee Director; and in On Gold Mountain, my book about my family, she was my actual grandmother. Writing about my grandmother, who’s been gone many years now, allows me to be with her every day.

If you could offer a childhood version of yourself one piece of advice, what would it be?

Don’t worry so much.